Sing 2: I am tired and I never want to do this again

This is it. The final Illumination animated movie. Our marathon is finally reaching it’s end. We won’t need to talk about this studio again until the Mario movie comes out.

Thank. God! *Sobs in relief in the corner*

After the events of the first movie, all the cast work at the same theater together. When their show fails to impress a talent scout for a big-budget entertainment company, they head off to teh city to prove her wrong. Their plan: throw a sci-fi musical featuring songs from Clay Calloway, a legendary rock star who disappeared fifteen years ago. Now the gang need to find him and put the show together.

This plot is just… so stupid. None of it works. It’s driven by annoying characters doing stupid things. It’s the cinematic equivalent of watching a boulder roll down a hill and flatten an orphanage. It’s loud, headache inducing, and you know exactly how it’s going to go down.

If you’ve seen any Illumination movie, you’ve seen this one. Repetitive, soulless humor with a half-baked message that could only entertain the youngest and most forgiving of children. It’s the same shit, different toilet.

The same point can be made for the animation. It’s the exact same style and quality as it’s always been. Which is to say that it’s not very good looking. These movies have all looked like they came from 2011 and I get the feeling they always will.

Let’s be real, the only reason the Mario movie looks so good is because Illumination had Nintendo breathing down their necks.

As for the music… yeah, it sucks. It at least has one original song, but said original isn’t particularly good. Aside from that, it’s just more insert pop songs. You know the drill by now.

Friendly reminder that this is still supposed to be a musical. The music is trash in a musical. It failed in literally the most basic thing it tried to do.

I hate this movie. I hate all these movies. Not a single one of them was worth watching. All I accomplished in watching them was giving myself a headache.

But it’s done. Finally. Now I can take next week off and never talk about these movies again.

Ugh… I’ll see you all for Mario.