Twixt day and night the spirits goad me on
Sonnet of a naughty satyr
They pine for ages past when hearts were pure
Against all reason now they seem unsure
They laugh and scream between mine ears anon.
Now fill my cup not once, not twice, but thrice
With flagon’s brim upon my lips I dance
Let unseen pixies toss their gowns askance
While I, the Carnal King, indulge my vice.
With folded boughs, the treants take their leave
As merry damsels’ corsets come undone
My song doth stir them like a summer breeze
They fill mine empty cup without reprieve.
The sun becomes the moon becomes the sun
I while away the hours as I please.
Lore: Literal Party Animals
Satyrs constantly seek the greatest indulgences, going to great lengths to fulfill their insatiable desires. They might kidnap a bard to hear a good song, sneak into a well-guarded palace to gaze upon a beautiful princess, or steal a fine meal from a dangerous lord. Parties, holidays, they allow no celebration to pass them by, regardless of the consequences.
Short and simple as this lore is, it’s absolutely rife with potential! You could come up with all kinds of one-off sessions or side quests with that premise! Perhaps the party is hired by a noble lady to deal with a stalker, only for that stalker to turn out to be a satyr. Or maybe they need to keep their eyes on a satyr during an intense party to make sure they don’t get into trouble!
This is the kind of lore I love. Short, sweet, and flexible. Perfection.
Design: Exactly What You’d Expect
Hello, Mr. Tumnus. It’s nice to see you again. Now, could you kindly get back into the wardrobe and go back to Narnia?

There’s really nothing new brought to the table here. Because… I mean, how could there be? Kinda hard to do anything new with the ‘goat man’ premise. Not unless you want to go to some dark places, which really wouldn’t fit the monster.
Is it a boring design? Yeah, little bit. But is it a bad one? No. Generic as it is, it gets the point across. It’s a satyr. Hard to confuse it for anything else.
Unless there’s some other goat-man party-animal creature in mythology or D&D that I don’t know about. But something makes me doubt it.
Though I’m open to be surprised.
Stats: The Trickster
Actually fighting a satyr is really boring. It’s one of the most basic and boring slugfests you could possibly imagine. Literally the only extra challenge is its resistance to magical effects. Lame.
But you aren’t really meant to use satyrs as enemies for combat. The challenge of overcoming a satyr should be in the magical trickery they play upon the players. And with that, you can get as creative as you like! If you put your imagination cap on, you could make something incredibly fun and memorable!
Or something incredibly annoying. You do you.
Placement
As a whole, this monster is pretty good. Its lore is excellent! Its design, while a bit boring, gets the job done. The only real problem is the stats; if you’re looking for a cool fight, you’d need something else. But if you want a creature to put at the heart of a magical puzzle, this is the perfect pick.
With all that in mind, the Satyr is going to #76 on the Best of the Bestiary!
- Beholder
- Death Tyrant
- Mind Flayer
- Dragon Turtle
- Mummy/Mummy Lord
- Nagas (all three of ’em)
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- Satyr <—————–
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